SolandMonica.com

Sol,
I am Bethany Ancina's father. I am working my way through Romans and recently read 8:15-19. In this passage starting in the middle of verse 17 through 18, I wondered why Paul wrote here about sufferings. As I considered this Word, your name came to me and therefore the reason for this note.
First of all let me say that I have no clue what suffering you have and are going through with the loss of your beloved Monica. The previous verses made a contrast between walking in the flesh or in the Spirit. Then in verse 14, Paul begins a wonderful section about our relationship with our wonderful God that is our very intimate Father. He has placed His Spirit in us to witness to us all that He has done for us and what we will be brought into (fellow-heirs with Christ).
But then this clause begins, "if indeed we suffer with Him". Why must we suffer? Isn't His work sufficient for us? All I know is that to the extent we suffer, we may be glorified. I do not understand why this should be. I do realize that there are a multitude of Scriptures that speak of our need to persevere, endure, abide because we will be pruned, tried, tested, persecuted, and knocked down.
Brother, I hope that you will be encouraged by verse 18 in that whatever our experience of suffering in this present age does not even rate on the same scale of the glory that is to be revealed to us. Even the creation is so eager in its wait for the revealing of the sons of God.
Although I have not yet come to these verses (28-39), I believe that the God who is in you has a great desire to accomplish a grand revealing of His son Sol. May this precious Father continue to embrace you in these days.
Dennis Hylton

Dear Sol, There is so much I would like to say to you. Maybe I will get your home address from Becky & send you a letter.You are so open so candid.Perhaps in your writings God will reveal to you what might be a new dream. But, while you are doing it ( the writing)maybe it will help with your grieving.I will continue to pray for you & Kai.Blessings on you both.In Christ, ~ Laura

Sol, try to get some much needed rest this week. We love you, Mom and Frank

Happy Father's Day, Sol! Just thinking of you today, and wanted you to know. Hope in some way this day was made special for you. You definitely deserve it!

Happy Father's Day Dadoo, I love you, Kai (3 yrs old)

Happy Birthday to Kai! Hope you have a good time at Chuck E. Cheese tomorrow. I know birthdays won't be the same but God is with us always, even when we don't feel Him. Tomorrow is the Relay and I'm sure Monica will be there in spirit. Last year's Relay is when I finally met her and she made me feel like we knew each other forever. We will definitely have a Luminaria out there for her.

Love to you both.

-Lidy

Dear Sol,
I am so very sorry for your loss! I am deeply touched by this website you and Monica have made together! My heart and prayers are with you and Kai! I can't even imagine what you are going through. You will continue to be a great father no matter what stuggles come your way!!!! Even if you don't always have the right answers, or when you don't know how to handle the unexpected situations or craziness that sometimes enters our minds and our lives. God is with you and Kai ALWAYS! I pray everyday that God gives you more of Him, more of His grace for these hard times!
"Let us come boldly to the very throne of God and stay there to recieve His mercy and to find grace to help us in our times of need."
Hebrews 4:16
Sincerly,
Cassie

Dear Sol;
As a single parent (as the result of a divorce; not the same situation as you) I know some of how you feel. I have raised Wesley 24/7. His Dad is an idiot and chooses no contact with him. There were many times I felt that way. That I could barely handle all the emotional times. My family was not supportive so I got no help there. Then I created my only family, my own support system. This one mom used to hear me fall apart and she would say, "pick him up and get over here NOW!!" If I was playing the pity card I would say "no" and she would say; "fine, then I am gathering my kids and coming over there now myself and the kids." And she did. The best thing I did was call her at those moments and asked for help. I know it is not the same thing because your automatic reaction of not being able to be put forth must be so hard. Especially because Monica was such a great mom and wife. I am so sorry that you have to go through all of this. I wish you many close friends to help you (which I know you have) just remember to call one. I love how honest with your feelings you are. You are doing all the right things. Hang in there. My prayers are with both of you.
Lorrie Freilich

Dear Sol,

There will probably be lots and lots of those times for awhile. The important thing is to allow yourself to FEEL everything, even when you don't want to. Be gentle with yourself, as you experience your grief, anger, frustration. Poor little Kai, he doesn't know what all of the feelings are and the only thing he knows to do is whine and act out. You will be okay. I know right now it seems that will never happen, feeling okay, but you will. Monica knows your heartache and frustration, as she does Kai's. Feeling for you,
Gloria

Hi Sol -

I'm sorry about your pity party. I too wish Monica was there to take him for a while from you but I know you're doing an amazing job being Kai's Dadoo and he's truly lucky to have you. You will get through this... I can't even imagine what you're going through but know that Jeremy and I think of you often and can't wait to take you and Kai to a game. Pick a night you'd like to go and let us know. What about July 3rd, August 7th or August 28th? Those are "Big Bang Fridays" where they have fireworks after the game. Please let us know. We want to treat you both to an Angel Game.

Love to you both,

Bianca & Jeremy