May 6th 2009
The past few days have been a whirlwind. Sometimes I wonder if I’m dreaming.
I can’t post too much detail because I want to make it back to the hospital as soon as I can. I didn’t have the strength to stay with Monica last night, so I stayed at my cousin’s house for a decent rest. Monica gets up about every 45 minutes to go to the restroom or take pain meds or talk to a docotor, etc. and after several nights of that, I felt like I wouldn’t be her best support person; I was afraid she might need something and upon calling me I would just sleep through it. A changing of the guards was in her best interest even though it hurts me to not have been there for her. Her mom stayed instead, so I know she was in good hands. Even though I was tired, I had a hard time falling alseep and I still feel like I got hit by a truck this morning.
The doctor’s switched her pain meds yesterday from morphine to dilaudid, and she seems to be doing better with the dilaudid. she is a little more coherent, and her pain seems to be managed better. She also has a fentanyl patch which started at 25 mcg and has been raised to 100 mcg in small increments because they were having a hard time managing the pain for a while. The doctor at the hospital told me that he thinks she has been in a lot more pain than she was telling us, because the kind of pain that comes from her condition is intense. He thinks she was trying to be brave for our sake.
Monica has definitively decided to keep on fighting, so please keep praying for healing and strength. She doesn’t want to give up, so we are not going to give up on her either.
I saw how many people signed up to follow her on Twitter recently, so I’ll try to post as many updates as I can. Once I leave my cousin’s house for the hospital, I still won’t have internet access though.
One more thing… thank you to everyone who has come to visit. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to answer everyone’s questions or speak to everyone. Like I said, it’s been a whirlwind. But we really do appreciate the support. Monica and I talked last night about how amazing our support network has been. You guys all really do make a difference. Some of you deserve medals for everything you’ve done. If I tried to list everyone, I would be here for another hour or more.
Please keep up the prayers and the hope.